Sunday, November 16, 2008

Automatics only please

Carjackers Frustrated By Stick Shift Car Shoot Victim In Face
www.wftv.com/news/15151650/detail.html
Man Recovering From Gunshot To Head By Carjackers
www.cfnews13.com/News/Local/2008/11/16/man_recovering_from_gunshot_to_head_by_carjackers.html

I am sure the reader can appreciate how frustrating it must be when an assailant is in a rush to steal a vehicle so they can crash it into the front of a gun store to gain entry, or use it for a drive by shooting, home invasion, or kidnapping, and they cannot figure out how to operate the stolen vehicle. How embarrassing it must be in front of their peers who are aiding them in the VLP (vehicle liberation procedure) when the carjacker, who is trying to stay on schedule is suddenly faced with the troubling realization that they do not know the difference between the clutch and the brake pedal. I am sure the readers would agree that it is completely understandable why they shoot those thoughtless inconsiderate car owners to punish them for purchasing a standard shift vehicle which served to lower the carjackers confidence and self esteem, but most importantly their productivity.

Maybe we should petition the state to implement a standard shift driving school as part of the perpetrators rehabilitation program once they are incarcerated, in order to cut down on future shootings by the repeat offenders who specialize in carjacking as their main occupation.

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